My Experience of Live Kidney Donation
My husband’s kidney condition reached a point where he was on dialysis and needing a transplant. I wanted to know if I could be considered a suitable donor.
So, the process commenced. From the very first conversation with the renal team, I knew I was in good hands. Knowledgeable, supportive, and genuinely caring – they have been with us every step of the way. You join more of a Kidney family than a medical team, if I’m honest.
The Assessment Process
The transplant suitability process was thorough. It’s a well-structured checklist of stages meaning I always knew where we were and what was coming next. Scans, blood tests, ultrasounds, phone calls – think of it as a full body MOT. Donor and recipient are assessed separately by different teams, with no conflict of interest. The question isn’t just “can my body cope?”. It’s also “can his body accept?” and “is this the right decision for both individuals?”
Our timeline ran from November 2024 (first applying to be a donor) through to confirmation in March 2025 that we were suitable match, and the transplant could go ahead. Our transplant date was confirmed for May 2025.
The Operation
The surgical team were slick, calm, and this was clearly not their first rodeo! Which was enormously reassuring. We arrived on the Tuesday for introductory appointments; we both met our respective teams – anaesthesia, surgeons – who talked us through everything, we also got the ‘X marks the spot’ drawn onto our tummies!
First thing Wednesday morning, I was walked to theatre, and my husband’s operation commenced around midday. We were both back on the ward early evening to recover in hospital for the next few days before heading home to recover.
We named our Kidney, Sydney the Kidney. He got the memo and kicked in straight away for my husband. The transplant did not, however, deliver the “how to empty the dishwasher” memo. That one remains outstanding! But my husband felt instant benefits which continue to this day. His GFR was at 6 pre transplant and is now at 98.
The recovery process really is about tough love! The ward sisters and nurses encourage you out of bed as soon as possible, which feels impossible the first time and only slightly less impossible the second! But gradually you navigate how to move and feel more confident with your recovery.
My scar runs across the knicker line: a 7cm exit point and two 2cm entry points on the left-hand side. My husband’s scar is far more impressive a slightly more dramatic 20cm across his right-hand side, a very neat scar marking where Sydney the Kidney now resides. I left hospital on the Saturday; my husband followed on Monday morning.
Coming Home
We both work full time and have two girls who at the time were aged 11 and 9, so recovery at home took some planning. Family looked after the girls whilst we were in hospital, my sister moved in for a while once we were home to help navigate the usual life logistics, and a silver lining, our daughters learned some valuable lessons about household chores! Friends rallied brilliantly, set up a meal rota, organised school runs and lifts to and from planned hospital appointments. I can’t recommend setting up a ‘friends and family meals-on-wheels’ rota enough!
The physical recovery is gradual. Your body aches, you walk stooped, you hold your stomach to laugh and you need to wear your surgical socks for a while post op too. You start with short walks to and from the living room/bedroom slowly building up to full mobility. One of the most uncomfortable parts was the feeling of heaviness in my shoulders. They put air into your cavity to make space during the operation; this takes a while to leave your body, so is an uncomfortable feeling for a while. After a week or so at home it’s nice to have your own space back. We reduced our help at home, which also encouraged us to move a little more and often.
I have some fond memories of our recovery as my husband and I recovered together at home, the girls were at school we’d snoozed, take turns to make a cuppa or make lunch and have simple afternoons doing a crossword or reading. Genuinely restorative and thankful for what our bodies were able to achieve.
We both returned to work at the end of June. We were very appreciative of how supportive our employers were, which made a real difference.
You must continuously listen to your body. Some days are better than others. Tiredness continues to catch you off-guard for a while.
Life Now
For me, life is unchanged. I do everything and anything I would do before. We have recently returned from our first holiday abroad in years, we go camping, hike, cycle, get to the gym, eat and enjoy a drink! Living a healthy, balanced life but with a renewed and an ongoing sense of amazement at what the human body can do and give.
As for my GFR, it remains where it should be. I feel no different for having one kidney.
One of my favourite parts of the day is the small daily ritual my husband started. Every morning, without being asked, he brings me a coffee. It’s his quiet thank you. I plan to enjoy those coffees for many mornings to come.
