I donated a kidney to my friend in October 2023. I was 75 at the time and he had his 71st birthday just a few days afterwards.
I had known his health had been deteriorating for a while. I’d driven him to and from hospital several times over the years for various appointments, and knew that his kidneys were slowly failing. He was still being monitored when he caught Covid-19, which damaged his kidneys further still.
In the years before, I had jokingly said to him “If you ever need a kidney, I’ve got a spare one you can have!” I meant it as a joke mostly because I thought I’d be too old to actually donate. Once he was on dialysis, however, he told me that he actually did need a transplant. So, I thought it was at least worth a try! I rang his renal unit and told them how I wanted to be considered for a donation. They had me in immediately.
I must say, the tests that you have to do before you can donate a kidney were certainly a lengthy process – but they were also very interesting! I suppose because of my age they wanted to check more to make sure I was healthy enough to donate. They explained everything they were doing and why they were doing it, which I found really helpful and reassuring. Most of my tests took place at the Royal Devon and Exeter Hospital, though a few were in Southmead Hospital in Bristol. The care they offered me was excellent throughout the process. I cannot praise the medical staff highly enough.
I didn’t mind the amount of tests. What was hardest for me was that, because I knew it was so urgent, I put my life on hold for a year and a half because I didn’t want to get involved in case anything sped up and I was needed. We were waiting for such a long time for some tests.
My friend’s kidneys continued to deteriorate while I was getting tested and he went onto dialysis in December 2022. He delayed it as much as he could, but got to the point where he really needed it to survive. I had hoped it would all be done and dusted by then, but they needed more time to make sure everything was okay before they could operate. He certainly had some rough days – particularly over the weekends where the time between his dialysis was longest, as he did it on Mondays, Wednesday and Fridays.
It took longer than expected, but finally the day of the operation came. The actual procedure only took a few hours. When I woke up from the anaesthetic, surprisingly I felt fantastic! There was no real pain as such. Some discomfort, certainly, but nothing I’d describe as pain.
The day after our operations I was well enough to walk up and see my friend, who was in the ward above mine. I stayed in hospital for four days, just to make sure everything was healing properly. After that, I can’t say I have had any issues living with one kidney.
Incidentally – I was advised by someone who’d also donated a kidney to have a pillow between my seat belt and tummy for the car journey home from the hospital. It was good advice that I’d recommend to anyone going through donation!
Unfortunately my friend has other health issues which really slowed his recovery. But as time has gone on, he’s only got better and better. He looks so improved in himself. His other health issues are still there, but thanks to his new kidney he’s far more mobile than before. He’s told me that he feels better in himself. He’s even directed a few plays since then! He’s been able to visit his family in Wales, which he hadn’t been able to do since going on dialysis.
I would absolutely recommend anyone donate a kidney if they want the opportunity to improve someone’s life, as it has with my friend. The whole experience has been so interesting and incredibly positive. I believe it’s a privilege that I’m in good enough health to be able to offer someone this gift. When I rang up the renal unit, I fully expected to be turned down – I’m already too old to give blood! – but I learnt that there’s no upper age limit for donating a kidney. If you’re healthy enough, it can be done at any age.
If we’re all honest, in my day-to-day life I wasn’t even aware that I had two kidneys, and what I’ve found fascinating is that after my donation, I’m not even aware that I have one. It’s made absolutely no change to my body and my lifestyle whatsoever!
