I was inspired to become a Living Donor because I was troubled by how tough dialysis is for those having to endure it. I am also a Roman Catholic, so I see it as my duty to help others live a happy and full life.
I first found out about non-directed altruistic donation through the NHS website. I felt motivated by wanting to help and felt like I was in a good position in my life in terms of age and circumstances to begin the process.
My long donor journey began in March 2019 with a face-to-face discussion with a living kidney donor coordinator at the Manchester Royal Infirmary. By July, I had also seen a renal consultant and an independent HTA assessor (for the psychological evaluation). Then we hit a major snag – a kidney stone was discovered in my left kidney on the CT scan. I had no idea that I even had a kidney stone! We could not proceed any further with the donation until this stone could be surgically removed.
Soon after, the Covid-19 pandemic hit in 2020 and my tests were suspended. This was extremely frustrating for me as I just wanted to get the donation completed! However, there was nothing I could do about it – it was out of my control.
It wasn’t until 2021 that the kidney stone was removed from my left kidney after two attempts. During all of the tests my health and safety always came first. I always felt reassured and given the full facts by the knowledgeable consultants and nurses to make my own informed decisions after each test. I never felt pressured. Some of my tests had to be repeated because of the delay caused by the pandemic, as they wanted to make sure my results were still up to date and correct. On the positive side, at least I had even more time to carefully consider if donation was still right for me.
By the start of 2024, I was still determined to go through with the donation. The Living Donor Coordinator officially registered me for the April cross-matching run. I was surprised at how fast a match was found for my kidney. When the Living Donor Coordinator told me that the cross-matching blood tests were successful, it began feeling more real that the donation was actually going to happen. My parents, partner and friends knew they were not going to deter me from donating as they know how determined I am. Of course, they were still apprehensive (probably even more than I was!). Nevertheless, the healthcare team around me made it clear that I could change my mind about donating at any time prior to the set date of the operation.
I was admitted to the Manchester Royal Infirmary the night before my operation in June 2024. I was put on an IV drip. When the morning came, I wasn’t nervous or worried. This was probably because I had been fully informed about all of what was going to happen. When I was being put under in the anaesthetic room, it suddenly dawned on me “oh my this is real now”!
It took them three hours to remove my left kidney. My kidney was used in the UK Living Kidney Sharing Scheme, which the Living Donor Coordinator told me meant that it enabled two donations to take place.
The day after my operation, the hospital’s living donor team came to the ward to see how I was. They showed genuine care for me and enormous gratitude for my donation.
Looking back, I did underestimate how much pain I would be in for the first couple of weeks after the operation, though the care and support I was given was very good. The nurses on the ward were always checking my pain level, blood pressure, oxygen saturation levels and bloods. I was given plenty of paracetamol and codeine to take home with me upon discharge too. By the third week after the operation, the pain where my left kidney had been disappeared completely – though it does flare up occasionally after periods of prolonged walking.
The date of the operation is a date I’ll never forget. It was the day when my life changed forever. I have no regrets about donating my left kidney. If I could, I would donate my right kidney too. I am relieved to know that after my death I can help even more people to live because I am on the Organ Donation Register. After the surgery, all my family, friends and work colleagues said I was a hero and a brave person for donating. I don’t consider myself to be a hero or brave. I just did what I was brought up to do – to help others.
As regards to the recipient of my left kidney, I wasn’t told much about them. I do think about how they are getting on and pray that they look after the gift I have given them. So far, I haven’t received any communication from them, and I am fine with that. I was advised early in the process by the Living Donor Coordinator that I may not hear anything from the recipient. If they do choose to communicate with me, it would be done through the Living Donor Coordinator. If I was to ever met him face-to-face it would feel odd because the only thing we’d have in common is one of my organs – that is not something that is usual for people to have as a reason to know a stranger!
My key advice for anyone considering becoming a living donor is to be prepared for setbacks (such as kidney stones in my case!). Don’t be upset if it’s not safe for you to donate. Don’t forget that even coming forward to donate is brave. Some of the tests can be intrusive and seem never-ending, but they’re all there for your own health and safety. In terms of emotions, don’t be alarmed if you don’t feel how you would expect to – the donor evaluation is so time-consuming that you don’t always have time to process everything you are feeling. I had a good cry in the days after the operation – it was a release of pent-up relief – a realisation of what I had done and joy all rolled into one. It is nothing to be ashamed of.
Also, be prepared to be extremely tired for at least six weeks after surgery. I was frustrated by my fatigue after doing any physical activity as I don’t like sitting around doing nothing and not working. I was grateful to be back at work on a phased return four weeks after my operation. Everyone recovers differently and don’t feel pressured into getting better quickly. Lastly, remember to eat well, stay hydrated, and monitor your blood pressure. Your body will need lots of fuel to heal itself.
Good luck, and look after yourself!
